I met Maria at Modern English in Huai��an. And she was the only aged
woman I met who was still young at heart. As a young girl, I was
determined to become a woman young at heart, even when I became old. So
Maria could be the only person I should learn from. In China, it seemed
too hard to find a woman of this type. According to my observations, in
China, men or women would become very low-spirited after retiring from
their work. Most of them do not want to live actively, simply focusing
all their attention on their children. At least that was the state of
living of my own parents. Then what was the attitude of this Canadian
woman?
Maria was very open hearted. This was my first impression toward her. She
was dressed in a very comfortable style and had put on some cosmetics.
She always looked at me smilingly and encouragingly.
I seldom saw any old women putting on cosmetics. I thought they were too
old to use them. Though I was much younger, I was very fearful of getting
old. I even thought the day when I turned old, I would break all of my
mirrors to pieces, so that I would not see my wrinkles!
And how amazed I was! Maria had confidence in herself! And to tell the
truth, Maria looked more charming after putting on perfumed powders. I
even ignored her wrinkles and white hair!
Maria was born in London and she worked in Greece and Portugal as a
teacher. However, she spent most of her time in her home country, Canada.
In Canada, she used to live a mobile life. She said she loved the nature,
and she liked to camp in the wild forests. She would live in a gloomy
tent alone, watching the snow and listening to the lonely roars of the
beasts. As an aged woman, she remained a good traveler. With her strong
legs she traveled thousands of miles to China. Maria said that her next
destination could be Western China. She would keep on traveling, until
the day she was too exhausted to move a single step. To some extent, I
really admired Maria very much, because one of my relatives (also an old
woman) told me very decidedly: ��I just stay at home herding the cows all
my life! Nothing much outside! Everywhere is the same!�� However, in my
opinion, someone traveled around the world and someone just traveled
around her own house. How could these two kinds of lives be the same!
I really admired Maria very much. She told me she became a college
graduate at the age of 35. You know it sounded so strange in China. The
Chinese girls would be somewhat depressed if they were 27 or 28 years
old, because they were going to reach the age of 30 very soon. Thirty!
What a horrible number for a woman! And what if she was in her thirties?
She must graduate, find a good job and marry, or she would feel very
humiliated. Even me, an optimistic girl, would feel a little anxious on
my 25th birthday. But Maria, she told me she graduated at the age of 35!
Maria said before she went to college, she was a secretary. But she hated
that kind of monotonous life. So she made a determination to change the
course of her life. She said the most important moments in her life were
the day of commencement. And I was deeply moved. Why must women always
follow worldly prejudices? It is never too late to pursue dreams. Youth
is precious, but cannot be preserved forever. Only mature thoughts are
the life long treasures.
I could not find a single trace of unhappiness in Maria��s expression.
There was truth in her smiles. Maria��s philosophy of life was very
practical and simple. The point was she treated people well. And if
anyone did not treat her well, then let it be. She would never keep
grudges. Sounded simple but very hard to put into practice. It was hard
to be considerate and harder not hating anyone. Countless women were
involved in worldly struggles. Innocence and happiness are only for the
women who are truly open-minded.
There were also secrets in Maria��s success: ��Do what you want to do,
and never let failures stop you.�� It sounded simple but hard to follow.
Some people dislike their daily jobs. They might be very rich but they
never enjoyed the happiness of success. Some people never insisted upon
their ideals. Maria said now she was very happy, because she was
successful in her work. She was helping so many students to learn English
well.
I have met some obstinate old people. When I was standing by them, I was
always very respectful, never daring to speak out my own opinions. But in
my mind, I never appreciated this kind of authority. Maria was different.
Her expression was very lively and she seldom made any conclusions
absolutely. Maria liked China very much and she said China would change
the world. It was great for a westerner to look upon China this way! Many
other westerners revealed their arrogance when I spoke to them. Even some
Chinese look down upon China. But Maria said, she had visited some
Chinese families and she really admired them very much. Though these
families were not very rich, they were very happy. She said in the
western world, many people were not happy at all, though they had a lot
of money. They did not have harmonious families and they felt lonely all
the time. Then she added jokingly, as a foreign teacher, she did not earn
much money, but she was satisfied because her students loved her very
much.
This was Maria, an aged woman young at heart. When I get old, I will
remember her, so that I will be a woman young at heart, too.
Write to Sunshine: xjzhao@ctrip.com
Inside China Today. Service for global professionals. From http://www.einnews.com/china/
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